Cloud Nine ain't too bad.

The reason for my increased elevation is I met up with the other guy tonight. (Not Jon, the other one who I didn't know enough to write about)

Okay what you are about to read may be a little comical/frightening but you are NOT allowed to judge/mock me. Got it, chief?

This kid Joe added me on myspace. I usually never accept anyone I don't know personally but it said he lived in Bristol, just a town over from me so I figured, why the hell not? Plus he was damn cute. That helped. That always helps.

We got to talking and at first I thought he was a complete douche, really. complete.
But Myspace is notorious for giving the wrong impressions about people so we started to chat through instant messenger. Not only was he SO funny, but also very intelligent.

I told my friend Pat about this new kid I had been talking to and come to find out, he knows him personally! This was quite relieving, to say the least. That way, I figured, if we ever met up it would be because we had mutual friends and not because we met on myspace.

I have been talking to this kid non stop for the past few days and tonight we hung out. We met at McDonalds for a little fast-food cuisine (FAST being the key word- I had a meeting at 7 and we met at 5:45 so obviously our time was limited)

I had so so so sooo much fun! We did not stop talking the entire time. If there was a lull in conversation it was because we didn't want to be rude and talk with our mouths full of food. (Delicious chicken selects for me, mmm. The more trans fat, the better, I always say!)

We actually managed to have a deep conversation and crack up laughing at the same time. How common is that?

He payed for my food- not exactly a $246 meal a la Mortar- but the way he did it was so sly; I didn't even have the opportunity to object. His McFlurry came to all of $2 but he still payed for my full meal. Needless to say, I appreciate the little things.

I'm not sure when I'll see him again, but I really hope it is soon.
I have a date with Jon saturday night and suddenly I'm not very excited to go...
I suppose it's too early to start worrying about eventually choosing one over the other but I genuinely hope it doesn't come to that point.

Thirsty Tuesday?

Right when I was swearing myself off men, two come a-knockin' on my door!
The one I actually care about is a guy named Jon.
We used to work together but he quit and now he works for his Dad's restaurant.
Tonight, at work my boss told me that Jon was coming in to work for a couple hours.
I should probably mention, I've had a thing for Jon since we started working together in the beginning of September...on the other hand, I have a thing for half the male student body at my high school.

Anywho, I ask my boss what time Jon was planning to come in and he said 5.

5:15-
Me- Where's your boy?
Boss- He's a frickin' liar! He always tells me he's coming and never shows up. Whatever, I don't give a shit if he comes or not.
Me- Yes, you do. You're clearly upset.
Boss- No, I do not!
Me- Uh, sure. Anyways, maybe he's just running late. No big.

5:25 Jon arrives
Boss- See Elyse, I told you he'd show up. (to Jon) She was all worried you wouldn't be here.
*Cue death glare and silent plotting of poisoning boss' coffee*

A little while later, Jon went to the package store to pick up some beer.
While he's gone my boss explained to me how he is going to hook me and Jon up.
Sure, Gramps. Work your magic cause clearly you've been the missing secret weapon I've needed all along.

The rest of the night was very fun. We had a few beers and laughs, did I mention I fucking LOVE my job? What 17 year old gets paid for this shit?

Jon asked me to have a smoke with him after we closed so I gladly obliged.
It was a sweet little conversation and at one point he grabbed my hand- can't say I minded a bit. My boss made his exit by saying "Bye Lovebirds"

Er... Do I say something? (I didn't want Jon to think I thought this was some big romantic moment if he was on a totally different page) But, nope. I didn't and neither did Jon. =]
We left it off by me promising I'd go visit him at work tomorrow and I intend to keep that promise.


The other guy is pretty hot but I don't really know enough about him yet to add anything to this post. All I know is that, I am not getting my hopes up because I refuse to say, "It's all right, I just had my hopes up for this one, that's all."
I won't do it damnit.

Everyone needs to complain once in a while

Everything lately seems a little off.
I don't feel like my normal self.
I feel like I'm just treading water until I fall off a big fucking waterfall or something, if that makes sense.
Nothing is new and yet I feel completely different.
I'm completely lazy and it disgusts me.
I can't even get my shit together for college applications
I'm doing it all by myself and I know you're probably thinking "wah wah wah I did too, everyone does, so just do it." But its just getting tiresome.
Work is the same day in and day out.
I don't learn in classes.
I don't do my homework.
I maintain decent grades but I haven't handed in a single homework assignment for the past 2 weeks so I'm sure I'm slowly but surely fucking myself royally.
Give me some damn inspiration, would you?

To quote the funniest person I know-

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Taking a moment to say grace

So, the whole point of this day is to realize what you have and then appreciate all of those things. Actually you're supposed to "thank" someone or something. Being a Christian, I thank God. However, I feel this day has become an excuse to stuff your fucking face. I actually for a minute considered saying a little pre-supper prayer (a little thing I like to call "GRACE" for all you disgraceful atheists! JK furealz!) and then I was like "Fuck it" and just started eating. Realllllll niccceee. Too lazy to even say thank you to the big man upstairs. My food sure as hell wasn't going anywhere.

So in light of my gluttony, I've formed a list of things I actually am thankful for, not necessarily in any particular order:

My car.

You have no idea how thankful I am for my ride. Yesterday, I got into a huge fight with my sister (over BLUSH of all things UGH) and it ended with her screaming "It's so much fucking better when you're not around. All you do is bitch." and then me taking off in my car and crying in private. I'm not a huge crier, but that was straight up cunt-like.

Booze.
Now, I'm certainly no drunkard HOWEVER! It really lightens the mood and encourages flirting and social interaction. No one NEEDS to get wasted* but a little liquor can do ya good! Plus, when you've had a horrible month nothing is better than just getting absolutely hammered with your best friends only to wake up the next morning and have NO idea where you are. (I love reminiscing about my b-day)

My family.
They are really wonderful. My parents split years back but it doesn't bother me much at all. My dad is my hero and he is always making me crack up laughing. My mom is completely different. I drink in front of her, not a lot but sometimes I'll have a beer or something on slightly special occasions. It is just one of those relationships where I could tell her anything and she'd be straight up honest with me. She is very understanding of my feelings and my lifestyle. She, however, does not like anything outside the norm. My sisters are also GREAT people. Leigh is 9 years older than me and is a barrel of laughs. She may not be all in one piece but she can make me laugh til I choke my own Thanksgiving dinner. (TRUE STORY) Brooke, my other sister, is not quite 2 years older than me. She has a wonderful boyfriend whom I look to as a brother. However, she lately has been a complete fucking bitch to me, but that's not to say she doesn't have a lot of good in her.

The Opposite Sex
Boy do I love 'em! wheewwww. Everything about them. Not to say I'm a big ol' tramp or whatevz but I've also never been called a prude either. There is this one boy I'm trying to woo right now. I'm a little unsure of what he's thinking but I'll know in time. He is Brooke's BF's very good friend. He comes over the house all the time, I spent the night in his dorm once (Nothing went down to my poor fortune cause he had a girlfriend or whatever SNOOOZE.) And for my b-day he drove about 30 min to come have dinner with me and whatever, a very nice gesture. He also asked Brooke's BF for my number and continued to call me incessantly for a couple days. He suddenly broke up with his GF of 2 years too...Except he hasn't called me since he broke things off with her which makes me think maybe he's just taking some time for himself, totally understandable. My neighbor (the coolest 50 year old you will ever meet) told me he noticed whenever Ryan was around, he seemed to have "big-eyes" for me. All good, right? FUCKINGMOTHERFUCK WRONG!

ETP: So, uh, Ryan broke up with his GF then?
Brooke: Uh, yeah, why?
ETP: Well, I saw it on Facebook so I just wanted to confirm it.
Brooke: Well, yeah but I hope you don't think you have a chance.
He thinks you're wayyyy too young.
ETP: (crying inside) Uh..no no. I'm not into him or anything..just checkin'...

So is the never-ending saga of my pathetic excuse for a lovelife. This I am definitely not thankful for. Could be worse, could be A LOT better.

Back to Ryan- He's almost 21 and I'm 17. Granted it IS illegal BUT! It really isn't THAT bad. Most married couples meet around our age and typically are 5-6 years apart. SO there.

My new ipod

It holds all my supercool music (which I'm ALSO thankful for) and I also donated to AFRICA by buying it in red! A tech-savvy philanthropist with supercool taste in music, all in one? Who knew!?

And of course my amazinnggg friends. They are truly wonderful. So are all of you!


HAPPY THANKSGIVING!<3



*I'm 17. The day I admit to myself (slash put in writing) that the status of my weekends is completely dependant on how liquored up I become, I might op for a Fanta instead. Thus, my reasoning for writing "no one NEEDS to get wasted" Bring on the booze!

A new year and a new attitude

I've decided to change my entire dating style; it has proved QUITE unsuccessful.

By the way, not to stray from the topic at hand but my birthday was a BLAST!
My best friend came home from NYC just for me.
About 20 of my friends joined me at Bertucci's (you know, the better version of Olive Garden) for some delicious dinner.
I was shocked to find several of my friends bearing all sorts of different gift bags just for me! =)
I've never been the friend that gives OR receives presents. I think all that jazz is SO overdone and pretty much a huge waste of money, but whatever. I was ecstatic to open presents regardless of said sentiment. Plus at this point it was 8pm and I had been drinking since about 5:30.
Dinner was GREAT. I had stashed a small bottle of Smirnoff in my purse to spice up my otherwise boring Coke. Boy was my chicken marsala FANTASTIC. It was a very good dinner.

Following dinner, we all decided to go back to my friend Frank*'s place for some more fun. I have not been so drunk in quite a while. Holy shit. My goal of getting shitfaced was passed by FLYING COLORS.



My other goal was not. (hot boy in my pants) So, in note of this I'm changing my dating mentality.

To give a little background info:
By December of freshman year of High school, I had a boyfriend. He was my best friend, my first love, my world. This sort of love at a young age can really fuck with the rest of someone's adolescence. We didn't break up until August 2006, when he was on his way to college. Although I still loved him very much, this was my opportunity to experience something new. New at this point was a totally foreign concept to me.

I ran wild with this new freedom: taking whatever drugs that were put in front of me, hooking up with a few guys in one night, getting stoned friday night, wasted saturday night, only to wake up sunday morning and smoke more pot. side note: by "wasted" I mean smoking pot, drinking, and downing pills all in one night (a triple threat as we called it).

I have no idea why I did all this shit, but I did and I fucking loved it. I had never been a party girl with Tim and suddenly I was the girl people liked to get fucked up with. I would decide at the beginning of the party who I was going to hook up with and by the end of the night I would without fail every time.

Maybe this was all my way of self-medicating; trying to fill the enormous void Tim had so freely created.

Anyways, I've changed a lot. I don't do stupid shit like that anymore. I have actual friends now, not just ones I get fucked up with on weekends. My priorities are a little more in line. I like my life. I am sort of happy.

However, I live in a very small town. I have about 150 kids in my graduating class. AWESOME! This does not provide for very many men. All of the boys that are worth pursuing go to some far off college. I am used to being able to get any boy I want and now I really can't. The field has diminished down to a couple of mildly attractive boys, who most of the time view me as one of them. Funny how you males find neither my superb belching/smoke ring abilities nor my seemingly always unshaven legs, very attractive. (side note: It's winter and cold. The smooth shave sort of disafuckingppears when it is 30 degrees outside.)

This sort of constant rejection doesn't exactly do wonders for a girl's self esteem. Completely in the opposite direction, actually.

So, I've decided I will no longer search for a boy, as I have been doing since my last break-up (May) I refuse to try and hook up with any guys at parties. I will try to impress NO ONE but myself. I will work on relationships with my friends and completely ignore my love life.


I feel this will solve nothing but it's the only card I have left.

Hey Everybody!

It's my birthday on Saturday WOOOO.
Except not really. Well it's my birthday, I'm just not "WOOOO"ing about it.
I'm looking forward to it I suppose but it will just be like every other Saturday except I'll put a lot of pressure on it to be the BEST Saturday ever and then when it is less than or equal to every other one, I'll be let down.
I can already feel it happening.
I make a HUGE deal out of my bday every year. Why? I have no fucking idea.
I always end up being disapointed at how unfun they seemingly always turn out to be.
I got some cute clothes today for the weekend bash so hopefully they'll bring me some luck and maybe some booty too.

Plans are thus far:
saturday- Bertuccis around 7ish with all of my amigos.
THEN HOPEFULLY, I'll be going to my friend's house afterward accompanied by all of my amigos to get shitfaced and God willing, ready to make some bad decisions.

All I want for my birthday is a hot dude to make out with and a 6 pack of Bud Light.
Seriously, is that too much to fucking ask for? REALLY?

Is it just me or is there a recurring theme in my blog?
It's just been a while, folks.

Elyse here needs a boyfriend. bad.

Don't judge me for speaking in the 3rd person, I rarely ever do. Just on special occasions when the subject is quite serious.


blahhh wish me luck, I sure as fuck need it.

Would someone

explain to me why the hell I compulsively scroll to my ex's screen name and then incessantly check his away message? While you're at it, please explain to me why I'm so crazy!

I need someone new to obsess over.
Or at least to have some good conversations with.
Maybe good conversation is too much to ask,

if you are NEAR my age (ahem mortar you're out sorry!) decently attractive, a good kisser, and able to finish a book (doesn't matter what kind, though Kesey is a personal favorite) PLEASE CONTACT ME.


best!
elyse the portuguese.

Braces.

Really, I think they're making a comeback.
Some guy came into my work today, looked about 20..maybe younger I don't know.
At first glance he was pretty cute.
We were sort of flirting and then he smiled- only to expose hideous metal wires and gears eating his teeth.
The flirting on my end ended abruptly.
Never get braces if you're over the age of 14.
UNLESS it's Invisaline or however you spell it.
Just spring for the extra grand and save yourself years of looking like a douche bag.

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Today at work I met my future husband.
He was perfect, a bit old though.
He came in and I was like wow this dude's hot.
And I was sitting at the little bar and he was at a nearby table so he began to make conversation: "So..do you live around here? Well, obviously, or else you wouldn't be working here." "Uh, yeah I live right down the street actually."

We got to talking for about a half hour as he was eating and whatever else. He went to RISD and was totally casual about it. A lot of people like to throw that sort of shit in your face but he was like yeah, "I went to art school in Providence." "Oh yeah, which?" (I know nothing about art schools) "RISD" "Um are you serious? Holy shit." He kind of just laughed it off and kept talking. We talked for a while, it was very nice. He seemed sort of interested but I don't know if he was just being friendly considering there was at least a 7 year age difference. Unfortunately, he was just passing through town so I told him to come in again if he was ever in the area.

We didn't even exchange names which seems a bit ironic. A first name is pretty impersonal when you think about it. Millions of people share the same names and yet you can have a lengthy conversation with a stranger, discussing everything from where you grew up and where you hope to be a few years down the road, and never even ask their first name.

I really hope he comes in again.

Anyways! Big things poppin' for the weekend!
My friend Tucker has this friend that lives a couple towns over. I met said friend over the summer when Tucker threw a party. He was definitely a babe and we actually ended up talking quite a bit; none of which I can recall due to mass alcohol consumption. Come to find out he has a girlfriend, or as Tucker puts it, "They're sort of going out." Translation= He cheats on her all the time and she doesn't know about it.

Well, Tucker told me that this kid (Brendan) is coming to town this weekend to party with the big boys. He actually asked if I was going to be around. This was initially flattering but then I got to thinking: Does he expect to just hook up with me and then make a run for it? Will I end up hurt and wanting more than just a one night hook-up? Will he be like every other guy I've encountered (except the future husband) in the past year?

And then I came to my senses. Who am I kidding? Short and sweet is the only way. Why even consume alcohol with the opposite sex if you're not even hoping to get a little lovin' by the end of the night?

I'm trying to keep things light and casual.
Unfortunately, I'm very bored.
I feel like nothing I do is of any value to anyone but myself.
It's exhausting.
Maybe I'll go volunteer at a hospital or something. Feed some poor people. Fuck I don't know.

This weekend sucked balls.

Friday:
Work til 7
Party where I couldn't drink/smoke/doanythingfun cause I had to leave at 9:30

Saturday:
SATs
Concert (I played in, not attended)
gym
American Gangster (actually this was fucking AWESOMEEEE. Holy hell is Denzel a babe.)
Uncomfortable car ride home with Dave, kid mentioned in this post. He NOW likes me but he's just a fucking basket case and I can't even handle him.)

Sunday
Laundry
gym
work til 7:30
Food with Dad
Fight with Dad
Fight with Mom
Blog.


Well there you have it. No exciting drunken tales to blog about.

On a lighter note:
Pats kicked ASSSS!
I now want to be an American Gangster or to do an American Gangster- the latter the more likely of the two.
My abs are gettin' to be in tip-top condish! =)
ANDDDD- 4 day weekend coming up= another trip to CCSU!